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How to Stay Calm, Cool, and Collected While Planning Your Wedding
Planning your wedding is such an exciting, memorable, and monumental time in your life. However, it’s no secret that it can also be a complex, exhausting, and stressful time as well. But don’t worry, it doesn’t have to be! Here are some of our favourite pieces of “wisdoms” for overcoming the stresses of planning for your big day, all while remaining calm, cool, and collected!
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Hiring a Wedding Planner
If you find yourself extremely overwhelmed with where to even begin, we highly recommend doing your research and finding a professional Wedding Planner to assist you with all your planning needs. After all, this is their job and they do have a ton of experience managing all of the – unpredictable, positive, negative, fun, not-so-fun, and stressful – aspects that accompany planning a wedding.
Your Wedding Planner will also help to guide and motivate you through your struggles and breakdowns, large and small, and keep you on track in the planning. Their goal is to keep you focused on the fun and happy side of things, so you can revel in your excitement and focus on the important things – like marrying your love and getting to celebrate with family and friends. Let them do the organizing while you enjoy picking out the cake and cocktails, bridesmaids dresses, groomsmen gifts, invitations, flowers, colour schemes and so on.
Hiring a professional Wedding Planner also saves you time and money, given their extensive knowledge and expertise when it comes to managing budgets, negotiating with vendors, and keeping everything organized. They will keep everything in one place so nothing important gets overlooked and becomes an issue down the line.
Tip: Be sure to ask about all the planning offers a Wedding Planner has. We understand that budget is a factor but there are many different types of packages Wedding Planners offer so don’t be intimidated – we create different packages to fit different needs because everyone (and their budgets) are different and we want to make sure we have options for our couples.
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Lean on Your Bridesmaids
You would go to the ends of the earth for your friends on their wedding day, so don’t feel guilty expecting the same from them. You chose them for a reason, and as your bridesmaids, they are there for you to lean on and go to for help. That way you are remaining calm and they are helping make your planning as stress-free as possible.
Don’t get hung on up on pleasing everyone either–there are movies crafted about the intricacies of bridesmaids for a reason. If you find that your bridesmaids are being demanding, uncooperative, or downright rude, kindly talk to them about the issue and determine a solution that works for both of you. Sometimes the stress of things or the mix of their wedding duties and day to day life just might be getting to them – and that’s understandable. They’re your friends so simply just have a chat. Schedule a chat, or pull them aside for a private moment to clear things up. Sometimes it can feel uncomfortable speaking up and asking the people closest to you what is wrong, but you’ll both be happier after you talk it out and resolve what was bothering you.
Tip: Designate a point-person in the group to handle any issues that may arise if you are unable to, or simply don’t want to be involved or stressed out by these problems. Usually, it’s your Maid of Honour, but feel free to choose whoever you think can handle being in control without being overbearing. It will be a big relief to you and the rest of the wedding party!
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Don’t Worry About Pleasing Everyone
Weddings are a beautiful time and there are so many planning aspects for everyone to get excited about, but sometimes this can really stress a bride out. You will realize pretty quickly that almost everyone will have an opinion, but it doesn’t mean you have to listen. Be appreciative of all the feedback and creative input, after all, most people are just trying to help or be involved, but do what makes you happy and what aligns with your vision for your big day.
There’s no reason to feel guilty for choosing something you want over the suggestion made by your friends, magazines, or future in-laws. You don’t have to be rude, but standing firm on your decisions is important, otherwise you will end up walking down the aisle of someone else’s dream wedding. Also, saying no creates boundaries and will help other people realize if they are overstepping. At the end of the day, people will understand that this is your special day and they will want you happy – and if they don’t, this is something out of your control and you shouldn’t have to worry about it!
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Involve Your Soon-to-be Spouse
It can be challenging to feel connected to your partner while planning a wedding. Like we mentioned, it’s not a piece of cake (pun intended) and can be very stressful. Oftentimes, soon-to-be brides allow wedding planning to completely consume their thoughts and conversations. We get it – there is SO much to do and you’re on a deadline.
We recommend picking specific times and days to focus on wedding-related tasks and events. Maybe every Tuesday night is wedding planning night. The two of you chat through what needs to get done, what you’ve found for vendors or ideas throughout the week and then you spend a couple of hours working on the wedding. It’s amazing how many couples don’t designate time and just fit it in here and there. You’ll feel so much better if you actually sit down and schedule out when to do things and working on it together as a team (considering this your first team building/marriage building exercise!)
Also, make sure you remain interested and productive in your relationship, friendships, and life outside of planning for your big day. Yes, wedding planning can consume you but be sure to still see the people that are important to you and enjoy your life. Your Wedding Planner will also help you with reducing the amount of time you need to plan by their experience and knowledge in the industry (the research time alone they cut out for you is SO valuable) so be sure to lean on them to save you time.
There’s no unimportant task (small annoying ones, sure, there are lots of those) when planning a wedding, so sit him down and get an idea of what aspects of planning your big day excites him. Is he into music? Have him research DJs and bands and create a suggested list of songs he’d like to hear them play. Is he creative? Get him involved in choosing decor for the venue, whether it’s picking out unique centrepieces, designing or building the seating chart, or choosing colour schemes. Maybe your guy is more interested in picking out the cake with you and choosing the cocktail menu, and that’s okay, too! You’ll be happy to bond over the details, large or small.
Tip: Be sure to bring your partner to planning and vendor meetings. Sometimes when the load is all on you it can be easy for them to think there’s not much to this “planning stuff”. Ask them to come along. They’ll really start to get a feel for what really is all involved in making it happen.
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Wedding Day Attire
Summer weddings are beautiful, but the warm weather can be problematic, especially for men. Women traditionally wear lightweight dresses and don’t have to worry as much about things like sweating or being uncomfortable in multiple layers.
Keeping cool and comfortable under the sun doesn’t have to be such a challenge, thought. To keep everyone cool and dry, make sure the layers men are dressing in are made with light, breathable fabric. Also, stick to quality undergarments that are made to prevent unwanted sweating and bunching, like Tommy John’s underwear and undershirts. Their products don’t bunch and eliminate moisture, so there should be zero issues with untucked shirts or uncomfortable sweating. What a win for the groomsmen.
Tip: When getting the suits made – or ordering your rentals – be sure to arrange a back up shirt. It can be really nice for the guys to get to change into something fresh after all that time outside, running around, doing photos, etc.
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Develop a Backup Plan
Formulating a backup plan is guaranteed to eliminate stress and help ease your mind while planning your wedding, especially if you’ve selected an outdoor venue. Of course it’s ideal to get married outside under blue skies and beside beautiful, botanical gardens, but sometimes mother nature has other plans.
Work with your Wedding Planner to develop a Plan B that will combat any weather-related issues that arise. Choosing an indoor-outdoor venue is a great option for uncooperative weather, and it also provides a place for you and your guest to go that ensures everyone will stay warm and dry!
Reserving an indoor space in addition to your outdoor location may be costly, so another more budget-friendly option to consider is renting a tent. When you picture using a tent as your backup plan you might be thinking of it as an unsightly alternative, but don’t worry, there are so many ways to make it beautiful and look like it was part of the plan all along.
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Stay in the moment & remember what it’s all about
Planning a wedding is going to be tough, but referencing these tips and taking care of yourself will allow you to really enjoy the process and will eliminate stress that can otherwise ruin your day. If you keep your cool you will be able to remain calm and really be in the moment, rather than worrying about every detail.
